ONE HUNDRED NINETY FOUR…midnight histerics

We have been full-timers now for 4 months and 4 days.

126 days in total.

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We are taking off for coastal California this afternoon. Our 6 days in Mount Shasta has been as wonderful as our previous 4 weeks. The weather is perfect this time of year! The trees are changing colors, the days are sunny and cool, and the nights are chilly. I sleep best when the room is cool and I can wrap myself up amongst a heap of blankets.

I daresay, last night was perfect: The wind was heavy, the air cool, and the rain was falling heavy on our roof. Greg and I each have a little window on either side of our bed. Although I would classify Greg’s side as being a little temperamental, Greg loves cool fresh air at night, so for him it’s worth the fight.

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I vaguely remember waking up for a glass of water around the 1:00 a.m. hour and hearing him fidgeting with his window. He pinched the center levers together and raised the window to its maxed out 4 inches. Letting that cool air stream in. Then he proceeded to turn to his left side, his favorite sleeping position, flipped his pillow a couple of times, and nestled his head right in the center. As his breathing began to get heavier, I hear the window slowly sliding down. It was the slowest slide in the history of sliding (falling) windows. Really, the mere 4 inches should, in theory, only take 4/5 seconds to fall. I swear, it was 1 whole minute of that sliding sound…and then I heard it…that ‘click’.

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It locked in place.

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I smiled and tried to hide my giggling. He raised himself up on his elbow pinched the center levers together and raised the window for a second time. This time, I really thought it was going to stay up. But as soon as he settled back into his favorite sleeping position, it slowly slid back down and then I heard the “click” again. I tried to hide my laugh with a cough, but it became apparent to me, I was on the verge of hysterics (like the time I woke up laughing so hard I was crying – about someone trying to brush my hair with a comb. I have naturally curly hair, there’s no way anyone is getting a comb through that mess!). I did my usual roll-flip out of bed. I did my best to hold my nose snorts inside until I made it to the bathroom.

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It was a narrow escape, but I made it.

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And by “roll-flip out of bed” I mean I literally roll and then flip out of the bed. I throw my legs into the air and just sort of roll to my right side, then quickly flip my body over to land flat-footed on the floor, with my knees bent, arms raised above my head, and hold for 3 seconds…cause there’s not enough room for me to put them out in front, like the real gymnastics people do. I imagine my panel of 3 horse head-wearing judges holding up 3 ‘perfect 10’ score cards.

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The bathroom is indisputably, one step away from my side of the bed. It’s more fun to simulate a “gymnastics routine” than to go about our normal lives as if we are true adults.

Back to the story…

After 5 minutes, I wiped my tears of laughter away. As I opened the bathroom door, I tried to make a quiet graceful leap from the bathroom to the bed. Somewhere in mid-air, I realized all of our blanket was on my side, half on the bed and the other half was laying in a puddle on the floor. He was laying in his favorite sleeping position cuddled up in sort of a fetal position. He looked like he might be cold.

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Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think my husband’s sleeping misfortunes are funny, but for some inexplicable reason, I needed to get my giggles out last night.

EVERYTHING was funny.

A lot of the time, I wake up in the mornings to little Greggy throwing attitude at me. When I ask him what’s wrong, he always tells me, “You stole all of my covers last night…I didn’t sleep well.” I would say that happens 75% of the time. Up until last night, he kept it pretty well hidden from me. I always thought he was being a little “over sensitive” but now I have evidence. 

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After I pulled myself together for the second time, I quietly snuck out of the bathroom and re-distributed the covers evenly.

Lesson #5…I need to work harder on being a more conscientious sleeping partner.

I still have the giggles…but I think it’s ok because it’s Friday.

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